Some people find their life’s purpose early. Others discover it quietly, over time, through service, faith and a deep love for people. For Steve and Denise Schnackenberg, funeral service wasn’t something they set out to do — it was something that slowly, unmistakably, found them.

As they step into retirement after more than 30 years in the funeral profession, they leave behind not only a respected business but something far more enduring: a legacy of compassion, presence and genuine care that has shaped families and communities for generations.

“We Were Just Part of the Community”

Steve and Denise met while attending Nebraska Christian College, where Steve graduated in 1981. Like many young couples, they began their married life full of purpose and possibility, answering a call to ministry in Litchfield, Nebraska. “It was a little town,” Denise said with a smile. “Two hundred and thirty people — and we did a little bit of everything.”

Steve preached on Sundays, but his role went far beyond the pulpit. He visited people in hospitals, showed up when families were struggling and offered comfort no matter where someone worshipped — or if they didn’t at all. “If somebody was in the hospital, it didn’t matter what church they attended,” Steve said. “We went.”

Serving the community in that small-town ministry shaped everything that came next. When people passed away, families wanted Steve there — not just as a pastor, but as someone who knew them. It was during those years that Steve and Denise spent time with local funeral directors, learning firsthand what it meant to walk families through loss. “Little did we know that that was going to be our next career,” Denise said. 

Finding the Work That Fit Their Hearts

After six years in the ministry, the Schnackenbergs returned to Libby, Montana, Steve’s hometown. Steve went to work at the Asarco mine, but when it shut down, the family was given an opportunity for retraining. “We packed our bags and moved to Kansas City,” Steve recalled. “I went to mortuary school, and when I graduated in May of 1994, we came right back home.” Thirty-one years later — last Memorial Day — he and Denise are retiring. “It doesn’t feel like it’s been that long,” Denise said. “And at the same time, it feels like a lifetime.”

More Than a Profession

In 2008, Steve and Denise purchased Schnackenberg Funeral Home, becoming equal partners — both in ownership and in purpose. Steve was the sole funeral director for more than a decade, handling everything from arrangements to removals, while Denise kept the business running behind the scenes. “I did the books,” Denise said, “and whatever else he needed. I worked services and did removals when needed, but mostly, I was there with families. I was the one who hugged them. I cried with them.”

Steve was often on the road, traveling to their satellite location in Eureka, 65 miles away. “There were weeks we didn’t even see each other in the office,” he said. “I was meeting with families all over North Lincoln County.” At their busiest, they handled 230 to 300 cases a year, all while Steve also served as Lincoln County coroner for 30 years. “It was tiring,” Denise admitted. “He did it all for a long time.” And yet, neither of them spoke of the work with any negativity — only gratitude.

“I Got Paid to Listen to Stories”

When asked about his favorite part of the funeral service, Steve didn’t hesitate. “Getting to sit down with families and listen to them tell stories.” He continued, “People live fascinating lives, and while listening to the families, grief often softened into memory, families relaxed and laughter mixed with tears.”

“We had people come through our funeral home who were incredible,” Steve said. “One man had a sixth-grade education and became a nuclear physicist at Los Alamos. And, Shirley Temple’s seamstress came through our funeral home. I got paid to sit and listen to those stories,” he said. “It doesn’t get any better than that.”

Education That Deepened Compassion

Steve’s ability to connect with families wasn’t accidental. In addition to his mortuary degree, he earned a master’s degree in counseling, a decision that profoundly shaped his approach. “That counseling degree really paid off,” Denise said. “He’s really good with families.” Steve never tried to rush grief or “fix” it. He listened. He gave people space. He understood that a funeral service is as much an emotional experience as it is a practical one. “In this work,” Denise said, “you really want to meet people’s needs — not just go through the motions.” And they never did.

A Family Legacy, Continued

Steve and Denise raised three sons while building the funeral home. Today, that legacy continues through James, who is purchasing the business alongside Craig Riddle, whom Denise described as “like a son to us.”

“They’ll change little things to make it work for them,” Denise said. “But the way families are cared for — that won’t change.” Steve agreed, “They’re doing it just like we taught them.”

In June, Steve stepped back from day-to-day operations, allowing the next generation to take the lead while he remained available for support. “It gave them time to get comfortable,” Denise said. “And they’ve done great. The families love them.”

A Retirement Filled With Love

Their retirement celebration — planned in secret by their children — caught Steve and Denise completely off guard. “We weren’t dressed for a party,” Denise laughed. “We’d been working out at our house in the meadow all day.” Their youngest son finally convinced them to come to town for dinner. When they walked in, they were met with family, staff, stories and speeches from all three boys. 

“We were not prepared for that,” Steve said quietly. “There were tears,” Denise added. “The staff even had a wager going about when I’d cry.”

Stepping Gently Into What’s Next

Retirement doesn’t mean stopping — it just means slowing down. The Schnackenbergs are finishing a house in the meadow, helping James build a home, spending time with their four, soon to be five, grandchildren and continuing to serve in quieter ways. Denise has stayed on to help with the books. Steve will fill in when needed. “He’s going to be retired for about five days,” Denise joked, “and then he’ll be back helping.”

A Legacy That Lives On

Steve and Denise Schnackenberg will be remembered not just for the number of families they served, but for how they served them — with humility, patience and hearts wide open. They showed that funeral service isn’t about death — it’s about honoring life, holding space for grief and reminding people they are not alone.

As they enter this next chapter, the community they’ve served so faithfully carries their example forward.

Some legacies aren’t written in stone.

They’re created through the kindness of people.